January 2011
18 posts
Video games are making me crazy
I have waaaaay too much time on my hands. And I have become ADDICTED to video games. To the point where I’m saying up until the middle of the night playing them.
This is a very new development. I never played video games growing up. I was too caught up with boys, makeup, and hanging with the cool kids at the mall. I was not a geek nerd loser. I was normal. And now, in my late thirties, I...
Boys are weird
I was walking out of the liquor store today and a group of underage boys were waiting out front. I think they sent the tallest, oldest-looking boy in to try to buy booze.
Anyways, while walking out, the boys looked right at me and one of the boys said, “What about her?” To which one of the other boys said, “She’s too rich for my blood.”
Ummm, what? Do I look rich?...
Trying to determine your worth
Quitting my job and moving to Toronto has been the strangest journey. I knew it was one I was desperate to go on, but didn’t think through the “what do I want to be when I got there” part.
The truth is (in my case anyways) getting a job is easy. I could temp in a heartbeat. Work retail. Just today, I turned down a perfectly decent job opportunity.
But here’s the thing:...
Life's not fair
While I’m studying Word and Excel so I can “wow” potential employers with my “expertise”, Jason is in Chicago about to hang out with our friends.
I’m so bummed about this I’ve decided to not wash my hair and stay sober.
Why, Lord Jesus, why?
I'd make a terrible nurse
Growing up, I was not allowed to be sick or in pain. It was a sign of weakness. For some reason, my parents never believed I was sick, even when I was. Granted, I did pretend to be sick once or twice to get out of going to school, but that was not a habit. And I’m sure most kids do that. Now as an adult, I look at people complaining of a cold as wimps and complainers. I think “suck it...
Social
Watching “The Social Network” with Jason Sweeney and Avery Edison and posting it on a social network means my brain is exploding.
They are smarter and funnier. I have the best hair.
Don’t tell Avery I said that.
2 tags
Venus, Goddess of Lurve
Due my current status as a “House Wife of Toronto, Canada” and my monumental boredom, I have done some research on my new astrological sign.
Apparently, Taurus is ruled by the lovely Goddess of Love, Beauty, and Pleasure… Venus. She’s real purdy. It’s like we’re sisters!
Although Jupiter may turn me in to a swan for comparing myself to a Goddess.
Whatever....
Astrology is dead
I know it’s silly, but I always identified myself as a Gemini. I read up on all the physical and personality traits of “the twins”. Like a duel personality (check), extroverted (check), kind of flippant (check), jack of all trades, master of none (check), and so on. That WAS me.
But then I grew up and married a guy who didn’t believe in any of that stuff.
And today I read...
1 tag
If I were president
If I was president of my own country, I would call my country Damselesqueland. My flag would be red and black with a sequined border and would have a little kitty on it. There would be both universal health care *and* free hair cuts and makeup for everyone. My slogan would be “Live free and moisturize”. There would be wine fountains and everybody would have good eyebrows. My husband...
1 tag
Adventure!
I’m waiting in the airport lounge to board my flight to Chicago. They have free lattes and cookies here. But, sadly, I do not believe they are fat-free. I guess I’ll have to make due.
On the flight I’ll get to eat a nice lunch and drink free booze! Score!
I’m traveling alone, which is not the norm for me. I usually have a navigator/husband to show me where the nearest...
Impromptu Chicago Shindig
atsween:
For those in the Chicago area tomorrow night (Wednesday January 5th) and interested in hanging out with my beautiful wife and I — or just watching the pure maple syrup leak from our teats — the charming and alluring Lindstifa has made a reservation for 8pm tomorrow night at Theory (9 West Hubbard Street).
Be there or BE FORCED TO STAY HOME AND WATCH CRIMINAL MINDS.
IT’S A RERUN.
My six year wedding anniversary sucks
It’s today and it really does. Jason is sick with bad stomach cramps and I have the worst PMS in recorded history. I cooked a delicious pot roast dinner — that Jason could not eat because of his bad tummy — and I want to murder small children if they look at me the wrong way.
Ain’t love grand?
Now excuse me as I have to go stab a bunny in their stupid annoying face.